Ok, so lately I've been unintentionally watching things that make me really excited and anxious for the future. It's turning overwhelming though actually. Like, I'll turn on the the TV and see Knocked Up or My Fair Wedding with David Tutera. I mean obviously it's not just those, but it's seeing people living what I'm expecting to live in the next ten years, maybe less.
I'm not trying to freak anyone out by this, it's really all of my anxiety for what I want out of life. Within the next decade I mean. I mean, my mom got married when she was 22 years old. 2. 2. That's like, tomorrow! Ahhhh! I'm just in the mode where there is so much more to life than calculus and computer sciences and physics. I want to be at the point where I'm stable and I can plan my wedding. I want to plan the flowers, the venue, the guest list, the dress, the cake...everything. Even though I'm excited for planning it (haha) I'm even more excited to spend the rest of my life with someone. I'm not trying to rush it, I'll just be excited when it gets here...so I don't want it to be forever. Ugh I don't know if I'm making myself clear but whatever.
You know what else I'm excited for? Babies. That one I feel like I'm not as anxious for. I like being young, ready to have adventures whenever. I want to be able to travel and have fun with my husband and newly established life. I want to entertain friends with dinner parties and go out for lunch dates and be able to buy my friends nice things. But anyway...
I don't know. I feel oddly immersed in this world of non-academic life. I'm almost ready to start this life and find my niche with family and friends behind me. It may sound cheesy, but 100% honest.
What do you think? Do you think it's too early to be thinking about stuff like this, or do you think it's good/healthy to be thinking about this? Do you ever think about it? Bah humbug.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
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